“Through wisdom is a house buil[t]; and
by understanding it is established.” --- Proverbs 24:3
The foundation of relationships is understanding. An
example that illustrates the idea of understanding being the foundation of
relationships is genealogy. Genealogy is more than a discovery of names and
dates. Genealogy involves learning about and accepting one’s identity. It’s a
glimpse of the family soul. The insight gained allows members to grow beyond
fear, denial, doubt, and excused; while moving towards courage, acceptance, blessings,
and hope.
“Amazing Grace
how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me; I once was lost, but now I’m
found; was blind but now I see.” These lyrics to the well known hymn,
‘Amazing Grace’ underscore the spiritual benefits to understanding genealogy.
Though man was created in the image of God, he was born in the image of Adam,
as a result of the Transgression in the Garden of Eden. Genealogy is a tool to
reclaim that which was lost i.e. identity. “What
is man that thou art mindful of him, the son of man that thou visiteth him?”
Man should realize that their identity is more than their pedigree, lineage, and
material prosperity. Identity is more than the positive and not-so-positive
aspects of life. Identity is more than
public perception or public image. When man knows his identity there’s a
realization there’s no more ‘hiding’ behind mundane characteristics and labels.
Knowing one’s identity involves
healthy holistic understanding and acceptance of individual self. Then a person
may truly live up to the greatest commandment, “Love thy neighbor as thyself” and fulfill the ‘ministry of
reconciliation’.
There are levels of understanding that forms the
foundation for relationships. The levels are not mutually exclusive but
inter-dependent. The development is a continual process and provides strength
of character inevitably allowing for added strength to the foundation. The
common denominator involved in the development of all the levels is respect.
The idea of development recognizes there is a maturation process.
Level One: Understanding Self
In understanding self, there’s a realization of life;
that man is a living soul, not an object. Man is ‘fearfully and wonderfully
made’. Man has the capacity to act upon his environment not just react to his
environment. Man has freewill and is not merely a robot. Through many seemingly
innocent philosophies and practices, the soul’s adversary wants man to view
himself as objects. By viewing and acting as though man is an object, the
sovereignty of God is repudiated. True
productivity is the result of acknowledging that personal actions can produce
positive results. It’s the essence of the commandment ‘be fruitful and
multiply’. Unfortunately, through deception of the soul’s adversary, there is
encouragement for man to become an obstacle to their neighbor’s fulfillment of
the commandment.
In understanding self there’s a realization and
acceptance of strengths and weaknesses. Man faces reality; dealing honestly
with issues, not suppressing them. The result is man becomes a living epistle;
develops a testimony. Many individuals have experiences but very few have
testimonies. When a person provides a testimony, there’s no pride or shame.
It’s given in accordance with the character of God. There’s glory given to God.
In contrast, when a person recites experiences, there’s great concern about
public image or personal pride. A testimony confirms that the character of God is
able to bring forth life from a death-like situation.
In understanding self, there’s humility before God.
There’s realization that humility is not self-abasement or self-abuse (e.g.
self-talk that states ‘I’m nothing’, but rather humility recognizes that man is
unique creation, “I’m somebody’; there’s personal confidence). In fact,
self-abasement or self-abuse is actually deceptive insomuch it denies the
sovereignty of God.